after four months of putting off the unpacking, i finally did it today...in a ceremonial way. well it didn't take the whole day, more like the whole afternoon. actually, there was only a few clothes and some "stuff" left in the suitcase so it wasn't that hard. for example, the semi-scrapbook that Mary created for me, the book, cd, and dvd that my friends gave to me and the Philippine Flag that one of my friends stole from one of the classrooms in our university were still in there, also were some shirts. i don't why i waited for like four months to fix my things but i'm guessing that i was putting it off unconsciously. because you see having my stuff in the suitcase creates the atmosphere of temporariness. it's not like i am hoping that something crazy will happen and i will end up on a plane back to the philippines, i am actually over that delusion, its just that somewhere in the back of my head, i was still on ice, on hold, in limbo. after the "ceremony" was done, i just sat on my bed and stared at the empty space that my suitcase once occupied. i will have to find something to fill that space up. one step at a time.